Express Yourself

Okay, when you hear that phrase, Express Yourself, you probably think of that lovely song, or being outspoken, or sharing some part of yourself with the public... well that phrase had double meaning for me today. I am a nursing mom that has to pump on my breaks at work. I do it, it's not fun, but it works. Today, after school, I put the do not disturb sign on the door, made sure the room was locked, and set myself up for a "milking session". OMG! Of course, today would happen to be the day I didn't have a nursing cover because Jayden spit up all over it. Yep... I was barged in on. I heard the key enter the lock and started hollering: "No, you can't come in here! Get out! Close the door! Stay out! I'm pumping! You need to leave now! Oh my gosh, shut the door!!!!"

The custodial worker that collects the trash in the evenings came in despite my shouting denials and stopped in the hallway of my room, staring in shock at the boobs that were staring back at him though the opalescent cups of the pump. It was deer caught in the headlights syndrome at its finest. Kill me now. He just kept staring, stuttering, and saying that he just needed to get the trash. Finally, he backed out of the room and shut the door. I just looked down at myself realizing that, despite the fact that I had tried to slump, the desk was still at my bellybutton and my bust was on prominent display above it. I was finally able to turn off the pump and detach my mortified breasts from the torturous pump before calling Rhonda to share my laughter and tears.

I guess the questions will be: Will he leave a number on the board? Can that be considered a tip? Will I get beads like I would for the same occurrence at Mardi Gras? I'll just have to suck it up and head back to work tomorrow despite my short stint as the topless teaching dairy gal.

That's all she wrote... I just wanted to keep you abreast of the current work situation. Enjoy your week and seriously, when the sign on the door says "DO NOT DISTURB!" don't open the dang door.

Tom Luna

I try not to get too political on this blog because, let's face it, politics is a dirty ugly business, however I have to pipe in about this whole Luna fiasco. It hurts. As an educator, I find it devastating that my elected officials seem to have no respect or appreciation for the dedication, sacrifice, and impact my profession has. As a parent, I am flat out angry that the voices of the public seem to mean nothing and instead, they continue on with whatever the agenda is... FYI, it is not what is best for kids or for our society. As a citizen, I am horrified that when things need reworked, slashing the education of our youth and the services for our society are the "fixes" that the politicians come up with. I don't understand the mentality behind this push and I am scared of what it means on so many levels.

The Idaho Education Association will be holding candlelight vigils tonight. Please join us if you can. Let's remind those politicians that they are supposed to be elected officials representing the people and ensuring that no person or group is oppressing and/or controlling the populace. Hello... go back and look at our history and ask yourself why we are sliding backwards.

OMG

Watching Drop Dead Diva episode 4 with Spencer (when she handles her parents' divorce) and at the end of the episode I heard Spencer say, "Oh crud, I'm about to cry", before he covered his eyes with his arm, took a bunch of deep breaths, and controlled the urge. I got chocked up because of his reaction. He looked over at me and said, "I won't tell Daddy that you cried over that if you won't tell him that I did." Ok, there has never been a more awesome kid than him.

Too Funny

Today Spencer was playing with fake spiders, trying to scare me (see above). I asked him what he would do if he saw a real spider that big... here is a direct quote: "Scream for my life." I love that kid so much. :)

Back in the Saddle

I love my colleagues. When I came in this morning I was greeted with a cute yellow sign along with lots of hugs. :) Thank you, I love you all.

I got up early, woke up Jayden to nurse, sing and read together and then, after crying on Steen's shoulder, I went to work. I spent first hour sorting through papers, pumping at the end of my prep. My students were awesome and it was fun to be in the classroom again. We had a fire drill during the last class, students kept peeking out the window at the snow and wishing for a snow day, and Leslie rescued me fourth hour for an "emergency" pump session. I still wish I could be home with Jayden but if I have to leave her, I realize how fortunate I am to work in an amazing department with such wonderful people.

Jayden was super tired when I got her up but she looked adorable.

Someone drew cute flowers on the board for me.

Coming back to a big yellow welcome sign was so nice. :) Thanks again Leslie.

Moments

Today is my last day with Jayden before I have to go back to work. I'm on the verge of tears as I think about someone else getting to share her cooing silliness in the early afternoons or getting to feed her before her afternoon nap. I love being at home with her and I would love to be a stay-at-home mom, at least for the first few years. Yikes. I never thought I would say that but it's the truth. There are just so many wonderful things that I will miss when I go back. At least I'll still get to be the one to walk in and get her out of her crib. She cries her pathetic "why doesn't anyone love me and hold me and why am I alone" cry in the morning and then I walk into her room, she sees me and the grin breaks across her face. She adores her mommy and the feeling is entirely mutual. I love this little bundle of baby goodness and am going to miss her for those hours I am at work.

So all you working moms out there, please share, what was the hardest part of going back to work and how did you cope? Also, does anyone have any great advice for pumping at work? Take care and have a happy Monday.

Love

I know Valentine's Day is supposed to be a day to celebrate romantic love, but I think there are so many different kinds of love to be celebrated. I am a lucky woman. My family is quircky, annoying, crazy, and wonderful. My friends know how to challenge me to be better as well as edify me for my strengths. With these things alone I would be blessed, but I have more. I have a wonderful husband who still loves me and after 8 years of marriage we have not lost the passion. He is my best friend, my biggest supporter, and someone who helps me find the adventure in everyday life. Plus, he gave me two beautiful children.

My kiddos are the most amazing part of my life. It's sort of funny when I think about that because I always thought my life would not include children. Motherhood was not a lifelong dream but it has become a huge part of my life's purpose. When Spencer gives me a hug and tells me he loves me or when Jayden is grumpy but cracks a smile just for me I realize how amazing it is that these children are mine. They love me, they think I can work magic in any situation, and no matter what, I'll always be their mommy.

Happy Valentine's Day!

The Littlest Chef

Jayden was a huge help in the kitchen this weekend. I previously blogged about the casserole day here, but she also helped me make homemade salsa (from The Pioneer Woman) and nachos. As a neat little side note, adding lime juice and lime zest to meat while cooking makes for amazing nachos, tacos, enchiladas, fajitas, chili, etc. :)

Look at her holding her pink spatula at the ready.

She was happy to announce that the meat was ready to go in the enchilada nachos.

I went ahead and jarred the leftover salsa to put in the freezer.

This is totally random, but Spencer worked so hard on his Valentine's for school and then I told him he was supposed to put the message on the outside, not the inside. :)  We had to go back through, peak inside at the names, and rewrite the names on the outside sticker... so much fun!

So, how was your weekend?

Casserole Crew

Tammy, my very dear friend, and I decided to start having casserole days. I am heading back to work, after enjoying some maternity time with Jayden, next week and wanted to do something to make the transition a little easier (plus, now Steen and Spence have easy dinner options if I have a "mommy hates working" meltdown). Tammy is the mother of three, one year old twins (Pierce & Anna) and an adorable three year old with special needs (Asher). She is busy, she never has time to relax, and she needs to to have some "easy" nights. A casserole making day (which I read about somewhere online) seemed like the perfect solution.

The Plan: We decided to each bring supplies to make 2 casseroles, which we would split in half and share. Tammy made ham & onion quiche and chicken divan. I made sweet potato chicken casserole and lasagna. Oh my word, it was a fun morning. We were supposed to start at 9 am but, since I was up until 2 am with a wired baby, I slept through the alarm and got to her house, minus most of my supplies, at 9:45. I had to make a trip home for the missing items and then we were underway.

Ok, I love to cook, but I have to confess that there are times when I feel like I am missing out on fun social time because I am in the kitchen. This morning, it was a social girls day as well as a productive, time and money saving activity. The twins were wandering around looking adorable, Asher was watching Dr. Seuss, and Jayden was chilling in a chair, or being snuggled by whichever mom wasn't stirring the hot meat.

Asher loves Dr. Seuss and he copies the characters while watching "The Cat in the Hat".

This is just the most adorable thing.

Anna recently learned to work a zipper and now thinks she is a male model for a bodice ripper.

Pierce is channeling Lionel from Peanuts.

Jayden is just a little American Sweetheart.

:) I finally got a picture of Anna wearing a headband.

Pierce too.

They are just too cute (Asher is absent from this picture 'cause he was taking a nap).

Me and my girl. In case you're wondering, I always wear bandanas when I am working. It's not a fashion statement or a gang thing... I just want the flyaways to stay out of my eyes.

She smells amazing and snuggling her is the most wonderful sensation.

The Outcome: I came home with 4 meals (6 or so counting leftovers) that I can freeze for those nights when I am stressed, tired, and just need to throw something edible on the table. We decided that next time we'll each bring stuff for 3 casseroles. :) Anyone have any great recipes that they want to share?

Wow baby, things have changed.

Just take a minute to look at these images. I found them online when I was doing a search for vintage home advertisements (for a collage project). I cannot even imagine having my husband have the role of disciplinarian over me. It was hard enough as a child to be under the authority of my mom and dad, although I dearly love and respect them both. I am not a girl who flourishes while under someone else's authority; I need to know that the decisions that impact my life are ones that I have control over... at least as much as is possible. :) Growing up, my mom always told us that we needed to live Godly lives, to follow biblical teachings- yeah, I had a huge problem from the get go with that whole "wives submit to your husbands" thing. I consider myself a feminist, but an equity feminist. I am a woman, which is very different than a man, but that is not a bad thing. Each gender has it's own strengths and weaknesses. I don't think gender should be what determines who we are or what we do. It should just be a part of the complete package of each person.

Like race, religion, or sexual orientation, gender should never be used to determine what a person can do and how much potential they have. At least that is my humble opinion. What do you think?

Wildfire

Disclaimer: this show is not deep, intellectual, or of substantial value. It is filled with drama, beautiful horses, and a love triangle. I love it. :) If you're looking for a modern day western show, I recommend this show. Don't expect it to change your world, just plan on escaping reality in a fun story for a little while.

Siblings & Change

I loved growing up with two brothers and two sisters. Although there was a six year span between the oldest and I, we were still super close. Steen wasn't really close to his siblings. The age gaps are much larger and that worries me when I look at the nine year age gap between Spence and Jayden. It is my fondest wish that they will become lifelong friends that can love and support each other through all of the trials that they will face. Family is so important to me and I want them to share that strong connection, hopefully they will.

We have some changes coming up for our family. My maternity leave ends next week and I will have to wave farewell to Jayden at the daycare each morning and rejoin the ranks of working mothers. Ugh. I have never wanted to be independently wealthy as much as I do right now. Oh well. We do what we can and make the best of our situation in life. :) I love teaching and I am sure that once I get back in the swing of things I will enjoy it, though I'll probably still christen many mornings with tears as I give my baby into the care of someone else.

Here are some updated photos of the kiddos (mostly Jayden 'cause she's changing a lot faster than Spence right now) for friends and family. We love and miss you all.

Spence is so excited to have cool Valentine's cards for his classmates.

Jayden is most often found in her Bumpo or the Moby Wrap, helping mommy.

She hates tummy time.

Such a happy girl.

Seriously, don't you just adore her smile?

Spence eats a full meal when he gets home, but we call it an after-school snack.

Yikes, what am I going to do when he's 16?

Steen enjoys the limited time he has to cuddle his little girl.

I just love her color combo, pink and green.

Again... it's totally the outfit.

At the Cracker Barrel, seeing off Shane & Jim.

Sorry, but she just looks crazy, doesn't she?

Shane and Jim came to visit at the beginning of the month and it was an awesome and relaxing time.

Jayden has started reaching for things and she especially love pinching skin. Ouch! Her little fingers are strong.

Cutie Patootie!

Look at her gorgeous eyes.

She just looks like a little doll.

Wahhhh!

Translation: don't leave me by myself, adore me, play with me, sing to me.

Tammy gave us one of her Johnny Jump Ups and Jayden adores it.

I love the way she has her legs positioned.

I couldn't figure out how to rotate the photo, but I love this outfit. She crashed after we got home from Mindy's baby shower.

She and Spence love story time. We are reading "The Magicians Nephew", by C.S. Lewis. Spencer wants to reread the first Harry Potter book when we finish and then work our way through the series. It is a fun time. We all snuggle up in Spencer's bed and then I read, Spencer grabs the book to make sure I'm reading it correctly before giving it back, and Jayden coos her own story, trying to be louder than I am. Yep. A pure moment of motherhood bliss. :)

Late Night/Early Morning

Ok, I just got Ree Drummond's "Black Heels to Tractor Wheels" and have been unable to put it down. It is now 1:03 am and I just can't stay awake any longer. It is such a great book: funny, sweet and oh so romantic. It's been awhile since I enjoyed reading something this much.

Nighty Night.

Sweat 2

Ok, I've been counting the points but only for the last week because I am really bad at tracking and have been walking 3 miles every day for the past week. Weight loss: 2.2 pounds. It's a start.

Sweet Potatoes & Poached Eggs

Yummy and easy breakfast.

What you need:

1 sweet potato, diced

1 onion, diced

1 red potato, diced

olive oil

dried dill weed

kosher salt

pepper

herbs de provence

eggs

How to make it:

Dice the potatoes and onion and throw in a pan with one tablespoon of olive oil. Add 1 tablespoon of herbs de provence, 1 teaspoon of dill, as well as a pinch of salt and a few turns of freshly ground pepper and saute until the onions are clear and the potatoes are nicely crisped.

While you are cooking the potatoes, boil water in a shallow pan and add some vinegar. Once it has boiled, turn down the heat. Crack an egg into a small bowl and then stir the water and gently slide the egg into the water, repeat (you can cook two eggs at a time) and set the timer for 3 minutes. Once the time goes off, scoop out the eggs, sprinkle with salt and pepper, and add to the plate. Add a serving of the potatoes and enjoy. This feeds our family (Steen, Spence, and I) so alter recipe accordingly based on how many you will be serving.